Jealousy of an older child toward a younger one
Love is a strong, all-consuming feeling, diverse in its manifestations. Especially in children who respond sincerely to events that happen to them. With the appearance of a brother or sister, older children begin to feel jealousy towards the younger.
This article will help to understand the causes, ways to express children’s jealousy, and how to properly respond to the manifestations of this feeling.
For the birth of a second child … be prepared
You are about to have a baby boy. This long-awaited joyful event changes the habitual lifestyle of the family. If the family already has a chad, it feels the change more acute than adults: it covers jealousy of the youngest. Mom’s attention is now divided between the two, and the newborn gets a lot more. To the older child, as before, feel loved and wanted, it is worth even before the birth to prepare the firstborn for the fact that soon the mother will have two children.
What can you do even during pregnancy to cope with childhood jealousy:
- Rejoice as a family about the arrival of a little brother or sister, In accessible language tell your child how small and defenseless babies are born.
- Explain to your firstborn why the newborn needs a lot of attention. Show pictures and videos of him as a baby, tell him how he was fed, dressed and bathed.
- Let the older child know before the birth that a sibling will not run and play with him until a couple of years from now. In the meantime, the baby will lie in his crib, crying often and will not be able to do anything without his mother.
- Let the firstborn cares for the baby, and be sure to praise him for it, tell him how big he is and how you need his help. Emphasize his seniority, but remember that he is still a child who can’t think, feel and act like an adult. This is especially true for boys. Girls tend to be less jealous due to their natural tendency to take care of their younger siblings.
Childhood jealousy is not a vice, but the norm
First of all, I want to reassure parents: the jealousy of the older child – a normal, natural phenomenon.
After all, love and care from parents is vital for the health and development of every child. Therefore, children unconsciously, available means to try to return the lost attention. Well, if the firstborn child openly expresses feelings of jealousy, for example, asking his mother to return the baby to the birthplace, or expresses his dissatisfaction with his appearance. For example, one four-year-old girl said to her mother, “You shouldn’t have had a brother. Then you would have read me a book.
When parents come for family psychologist consultations, and it comes to children, it is revealed that adults often do not notice evidence of children’s jealousy of the second child or, having discovered signs of it, do not know how to react.
